So I'm walking to my bike after my legendary cup of triple shot caramel macciato, practically dancing to my own footsteps. I mean, that much caffeine does something unnatural to you. My Pulse was thready and rapid, my palms were sweaty and I was wavering on passing out. Hallmarks of some weird shit. So as I approached the garage I got the sinking feeling that my bike was stolen, and all I'd find would be metal shavings where they drilled out the wheel lock.....and there she was! The revelation did nothing to quell the bone shattering thump-thump in my chest that was bordering on painful, but only served to increase in everything that was bad. So, moving along, I noticed a security guard. He seemed younger old guy status, walked with a limp but smiled when he saw me. Before I could say hello, he hollered out "This yo, Vulcan 1700?!". I laughed and said "nah, she's 1600 but lookit dat azzz!!". It sent the guard into some throes of gut busting laughter. I smiled, mission accomplished. As I approached, his facial expressions became much clearer, he was happy and in awe. Well no shit, this dude is a bona-fide bad ass. He introduced himself before I could, with a firm handshake and eye contact. BAM! Insta-trust. I'm a believer in those 2, anything like a limp wristed handshake and downcast eyes make you seem flimsy at best. And this is an argument I get into with all people of all races, religions, creeds, and sexual preferences. It's almost a unanimous agreement, you are judged on the firmness of the hand and the gaze of eye! Ok? ok. So no shit, there we were, chatting up motorcycles, he was on story after story about his club he was involved with in De-troit. Man, this guy just held me with his stories. They were seemingly made up, but the fine details provided were what made them surreal. He was telling me a story about how himself and about 20 others on cruisers were making a trip from De-troit to South Carolina. Along the way in Michigan they picked up a kid on a rocket (Ducati). He kept up well, so they let him ride near the front of the pack. he elaborated on his style in a way which I wouldn't dare try to duplicate. But the gang was at a rest stop and the kid came out of the bathroom with a worried look in his eye. Some of the men started cracking jokes about guy things, but he just shut them up with "man, I'm peeing blood. It's not right.". So he went to the hospital. They called his mother for him and later received a letter from the mother thanking them and inviting them over for dinner for taking care of her boy. Real nice stuff. The kid was bent over so hard, that he put pressure on his kidney's and ended up straining some things and injured himself by accident. He went on and on about how they rode, what they were up to etc. It was amazing to listen to the man. I was captured by his easy nature and his love of motorcycles. I snapped a picture and eventually we parted ways.
I loaded up the bike eventually and went to the road! The clutch was almost not disengaging, but the fan worked everytime I flicked the switch YAY! I stopped at a Chinese buffet for breakfast, and ate them to the gills with 4 plates of food. They shouldn't have sushi. I ate it all. literally I was told, "no moe Mr." . It was good for a laugh, but not much more. I doused the sushi in soy sauce and that baby turd lookin hot paste. nom nom nom! Once properly fueled, I fed the bike and off we went! Into the wild! I had a mission for the day, make it to the Grand Canyon and enjoy it. So off I went!! It was a great cruise. The desert gave way to the foothills of Arizona elevation, which were dotted in pines and clear blue skies. The mountain passes were a little chilly but a t-shirt sufficed for the most part. Upon entering the national park, I knew I had a little more room on the throttle abuse. So off I went, passing cars, RV's and all sorts of people in Missouri license plates. I ended up with a silver Toyota SUV on my ass the whole way. The road split off a few times, but mostly if you were on the road you were headed to 1 of 7 wonders of the world. It was actually really fun! I switched from Classical music (Mozart) to Krewella's Troll Mix Vol. 12 (local Chicago DJ's that have made it) and gave this guy a run for his money! And that's when I felt the Sushi disagree with my style of driving. From every orifice it wanted to purge, and quite suddenly too. Oh shit. Well, the fun game of passing cars and waiting for the SUV to catch up turned into a game of pass the car before the sushi passes my colon. No longer was it a game....it was a war. I felt I was winning this particular battle when the line came out of nowhere. To get into the park you have to pay $10 and find your parking spot before you can get to the Canyon. Oh lord. through clenched teeth, and pretty much clenched everything I patiently waited 20 min in the line. The SUV rolled up next to me, gave me a quick thumbs up and a blown kiss. That was a chick. A regular Danica Patrick! haha, oooooo boy, laughing is a bad idea. So I make it through, park in the lot next to a bunch of bikes and run/stumble/trip/quickly walk to the nearest potty. Yikes, what are all these people qued up for the bathrooms for?!?!?! Well, enough shit talking, I made it out alive. Unstrapped my CamelBak and started walking, somewhat slower than moments before.
I could make out the color lines in the rock indicating something big and cool was in front of me. I was super excited. I walked out into a kind of clearing and saw the crowd of people. It was like angels were playing the drums and the Undertaker was walking out. That's the kind of excitement! Or watching Urlacher decimate Brett Favre. Just like "holy cow". It's so immense that you cannot properly take it all in. Try as you might on your camera, you cannot perfectly capture it all. It was amazing. The rusty reds, the beige yellows, the depth, the smoke from a far off fire, the tree line across the canyon. All of it was amazing. In this moment, I was all about the phone, snapping pictures, trying to send them and enjoy the view. The problem was that with all of these people they had erected a fence years ago to keep people from tumbling down into the maw of the earth. Although I saw people standing out on a sweet ledge hanging over the edge but with no fence impeding their discovery. I made my way over and started on a small journey down. You see, there is no path here, you kind of had to make your own choices, either follow the beaten path or make your own. I made my own. I slipped between some trees and realized I was about 7 or 8 feet above the ledge. The ledge led out about 15 ft before another drop, so I did what everyone else would have done, I PLF'd it. I vaguely remember gasping as I hit the ground and executed a sloppy PLF that would have gotten me an hour long smoke session back in the day. My knees locked and I flew to the damn edge, gracefully popping up and taking a bow like anyone cared. Haha, yeah it was a blast! 2 more ledges to go...and they were much shorter in length as well as depth. So I followed the beaten path. I made it out to the edge and was just blown away. I'll post a few pics from my phone so that you get the idea. The one thing I was impressed with was the Japanese tourist leaning over the edge posing. Holy smokes, this girl had bigger balls than I've ever had. I remember from my days in High School a kid was doing a similar pose by Starved Rock in Illinois and the tree he was holding gave way and over the edge he went, God rest his soul. I couldn't match that. I still needed to get home. So I took a few over the edge and walked around, admiring the sheer beauty. People see things like this and more than a few times I heard "See? There HAS to be a God.". I won't touch much on religion, but I prefer to think of the science, that this was once sea floor that has become a part of the land due to plate tectonics and a few billion years in the making. But never the less, you get the impression, it's so massive that most of us (like me) simply have a hard time grasping the enormity of it. I wish that I was in the physical shape to hike it, but after eating and drinking a bunch of water, I had to get back to the bike and get on with the trip!
Once strapped in and ready to go, I opened my GPS on my phone and locked in Sedona, a place called Kings Ransom. I memorized the first few major roads and directions then headed off. I stopped a few more times to get pictures and try to hold on to the crazy day, but the sun would set in a few hours, so I needed to push hard. Off I went, winding through mountain towns, forests and the ranches that dotted the land. The sun was getting really low when I made it to the outskirts. The sun was again casting amazing reds and rust colors all over the rocks, but the greens contrasted so well with everything I just couldn't get enough of it all! It was one of those moments that you know you will leave, but you don't want it to end. You try to do everything to keep it from ending, but if you don't get as many angles as you can, you'll lose it forever! So I pressed on, finally arriving at the hotel. I received a free upgrade because they were remodeling 1/3 of their rooms. Now, I get to the Upgrade and the soap in both the sink area and the bathroom/shower come out of wall dispensers. There's a little sticker claiming that this method is saving 1000's of plastic bottles. Why not recycle and save 1000s of bottles? So needless to say, it's kind of annoying. I went out on the town to find a place to type this up, but nothing was open past 8pm. Nothing except a restaurant, so I ate and went back to the room, catching the sun behind a rock for a great picture that I'll cherish forever. Wow, how amazing. The next day I'll have to get as close to Denver as I can. But that ride will be all mountain and not really fun. Rest and free breakfast await! Stay thirsty people!
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